Hobbies, Family, & Geekery from a Stay-at-Home Dad
This post is sponsored by BabbleBoxx.com on behalf of Alexia Alright, I’m going to let you in on a little secret. It’s something I don’t go blabbering to just anyone, either. So I hope you walk away from this with your newly found cosmic wisdom …Read More….
Winter is coming… But first is fall, baby! Best season ever! Don’t sit there and start trying to think of reasons why it’s not, you’ll just be wasting your time. You could think about winter and the pretty snowfall and cozy nights by a fire, …Read More….
Once upon a time, in a mystical, unforgivably hot, far away land – that you may know as Florida – lived my wife and I.
It’s hard to think about it now, but we were young once. We lived recklessly and laughed in the face of responsibility. We did unspeakable things that I, as a parent now, am appalled by. What did we do? I’m almost afraid to tell you because I know we’ll be judged. But I must…
We used to do things like… Stay out past 9. Spend the entire day at theme parks only to go home, get dressed, and go out again. We used to order Chinese takeout at 10pm to eat that night. We went to the theater to watch an opening night movie that started at 1am (that’s after midnight), didn’t get home till 3 (in the morning), only to get up in a few hours for a 7am shift.
We were rebels without a cause. It’s amazing what a few years and 2 kids can do to you!
Because now? We go to the movies once every 6-8 months if we’re lucky.
I’m thinking about the comfort of a couch 2 hours into a theme park. The thought of staying out of the house past 7pm for any reason whatsoever absolutely frightens me. And if we eat Chinese food after 6pm this happens:
.Getting old sucks.
What was the point I was… Oh yeah.
Something else we used to do on a regular basis was go out to eat. I mean, we were pros. We always loved going somewhere, enjoying a meal, having the age old debate – we’re stuffed, do we get dessert? – it was some memorable times. Now? It’s nothing but waste of time! And money! Oh boy, don’t get me started on how much of a waste of money going out to eat is. Do you know how many amiibos I could buy with that money?! Yeah, we still do it sometimes but it’s almost instant regret.
But I’m not here to talk about that. I’m here to talk about a restaurant we used to frequent for all of our special occasions and one that I’d still happily go to – Texas de Brazil.
If you never heard of it, you’re missing out. I’ve talked about it before – it’s a Churrascaria, specializing in various cuts of meat, carved tableside right onto your plate by an army of guachos. It’s a carnivores dream. But, what they also have is the absolute best salad bar anyone could ever ask for.
It’s a plethora of Italian meats and gourmet cheeses. Olives, breads, salads, soups, vegetables.. There is absolutely nothing I can say that would do it justice. It’s a salad lovers paradise and puts almost every other salad bar to shame.
Depending on the time you go, the price to eat the full dinner there is $45 per person! But the salad bar by itself is only $25. You don’t get the service of the guachos passing by with all their sticks of glory, but to be completely honest, you don’t need them if you have the salad bar.
And that’s where the inspiration came for putting this together. We don’t have a Texas de Brazil 15 minutes down the highway like we used to. The closest is 3 hours north and I’d be lying if I told you we didn’t think about it once or twice. But even if we did go, it’s not exactly a place where the kids could enjoy themselves. So in a feeble attempt to recreate my favorite plate I put together from the salad bar, this antipasto was born.
It’s nothing special or fancy, it’s just what we like around here. Seriously, this is some basic stuff we’re talking about, but simple is usually more than enough. Whenever we went to the restaurant, my plate always consisted of mozzarella, prosciutto, grilled provolone slices, chunks of good parmesan, sun-dried tomatoes, peppered bacon, and some toasted ciabatta bread. Yes, I fit it all on a plate, and I even went back for seconds. Despite my love for the flank steak, it wasn’t until the last few times we went that I realized I didn’t even want the full dinner with the meat. I was perfectly happy and content making frequent trips to the salad bar. And so was the wife, who usually grabbed salami, soppressata, and olives in addition to what I usually got.
The great thing about antipasto is you can put together whatever you like. Personally, I’m a sucker for sun-dried tomatoes but I couldn’t care less about olives, while the wife is the opposite. This set up is what we like, and if there’s one thing I want you to learn from this post, it’s that you have freedom here. If you’re a fan of artichoke hearts and sun-dried tomatoes, or you have the cash to splurge on some good parmesan, go for it! What I have in this post is just to give you an idea of how easy it is to throw it on a plate and make a great appetizer or mid-day meal.
Antipasto
Prosciutto
Salami
Fresh Mozzarella
OlivesCiabatta Bread
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Balsamic Vinegar
Notes:
Thinly sliced deli meats like prosciutto, ham, salami, capicola, pancetta, bresaola, pepperoni or soppressata; chunks of dried sausages, like chorizo, pepperoni, salami, sweet and hot Italian sausage, andouille or kielbasa; slice or wedge chunks of your favorite cheeses like parmesan, pecorino, provolone, gruyere, manchego, ricotta salata, gouda, feta, brie, blue cheese or goat cheese; sliced celery, tomatoes, marinated sun dried tomatoes, pickled eggplant and zucchini, roasted red peppers, marinated artichoke hearts, roasted asparagus, carrots, stuffed cherry peppers, marinated mushrooms, cauliflower, chickpeas, mixed green and black olives, roasted cipollini onions, capers, small pickles, or pepperoncini peppers.
The list can go on and on. It’s a pretty sweet article with a good story, lots of info and tips so check it out.
Alright, there’s no real mystery to this.
If you’re trying to impress someone or you’re doing this for a party, you may want to stress presentation. There’s something about a well organized and properly presented plate of antipasto that just feels right.
Heck, when it’s just the wife and I, I still have to fix up the plate instead of just throwing everything on there. I could give you a few tips on presentation, but seriously, it’s not rocket science. You really need to try and mess up in order to make a plate of arranged meats and cheeses look bad.
The presentation depends on the type of plate you’re using. If it’s a big platter, you have a lot more room to play with. If it’s a little plate like I used, you have to try and utilize the space you have. Whether it be a platter, plate, big wooden cutting board, it doesn’t matter, the arrangement is traditionally the same regardless of what you use.
One of the only rules is you have to have order on the plate, or else it’s just going to look like you don’t care. And you do care, right? Things like olives, sun-dried tomatoes, or julienned roasted red peppers, typically go in the middle. You could spruce them up by putting them on a bed of mixed greens, again, just don’t mix them all up. Keep them well divided. If you have the room and the hardware, you can also put them in bowls and keep the plate for just the heavy hitters.
Whatever meats and cheeses you decide to use, make sure they’re arranged in groups. Meaning don’t cross the streams and layer the prosciutto with the salami. Have the salami in one spot, the prosciutto next to it, the capicola next to that, and so on. The same goes for the cheeses, vegetables, everything.
Again, don’t be afraid to set up small bowls on the side with various things. Like if olives are a big hit in your house, just put them in a bowl. Get small dishes and keep the balsamic and extra virgin olive oil at the table so every can help themselves.
Also, it’s not abnormal to set out a separate plate of caprese salad to accompany the antipasto. Trust me, if it’s there, people will eat it and in turn, love you.
Of course, I’m talking as if this is for a party. You must keep in mind antipasto literally translates to “before the meal”. Your appetizer. So yes, you can totally have this as the main course, but traditionally speaking, the antipasto is the precursor to an italian dinner. I’m just warning you, don’t go putting out 5 plates of antipasti and then expect everyone to eat dinner a half hour later.
Personally, my kryptonite is sandwiches. So if I see bread, meat, and cheese on a platter, I’m making me a sandwich!
There’s not much more to really say. I mean, it’s sliced meat and cheese? O0o0o0, olives and bread too. Curve balls. If you’ve never put a plate like this together do not stress it. Give it a shot one night, spice up the dinner table. Know you’re going to have spaghetti or lasagna one night? Go ahead and take a trip to the deli and get a few slices of meat. Buy a ball of mozzarella. Get a loaf of good bread. Surprise the family and see what happens. It doesn’t have to be extravagant like the plates pictured above from Texas de Brazil. Keep it simple is probably the best advice I could give you. You don’t need a spread of 10 different components. Stick to 3-5 different things plus the bread and you and your family will feel like royalty.
Dark Horse Update 10/26/19: So the mad scientist that the wife is, improved her recipe! After countless experimentations, and even more cursing and swearing, she has found the perfect balance of cheeses and creams and macaroni. Seriously, just thinking about it is making my mouth …Read More….
Summer! …Summer is here, right? It better be because it’s pretty hot out there. It could be just as hot here as it is in Florida but I wouldn’t complain. I’d be able to find solace in the fact that the heat will only last …Read More….
The Rains of Castamere ‘String Quartet’
Happy Game of Thrones Day Week!
I know, I know.. I’m a few days late and I missed all the premier viewing parties, but season 4 just started! You have 9 more weeks to make this and share it with guests!
If you’re not sure what I’m talking about and you don’t watch Game of Thrones, season 4 premiered last night and there is plenty cause for celebration!
If you recall, for season 3’s premier, I posted A Pie of Ice and Fire – an epic beef and bacon pie that is hard to look away from and even harder to not stuff your face with. The recipe was from the Official Game of Thrones cookbook/blog, Inn at the Crossroads, which is authored/ran by, Chelsea and Sariann.
After reminiscing how awesome that pie was and how many people loved it, I started wondering what recipe will I do for this premier. Then I thought – why only do something for the premier?
So I held my breath and I sent a raven to Chelsea, asking if she wouldn’t mind me posting a few of those amazing recipes from Inn at the Crossroads on my blog. To my surprise, not only did she respond, but she was incredibly cool with the idea!
So here we are! My first attempt to honor Inn at the Crossroads and the awesome work they do. I’m going to try and make this a weekly or semi-weekly thing throughout the duration of the 4th season so stay tuned for Game of Thrones related goodness throughout the coming weeks.
So without further ado, let’s talk about Bread and Salt…
It may sound simple and nothing worth dedicating a post to, but I think this is one of the most important foods you’ll find throughout Westeros. Not because of its complexity (which it lacks), presentation or flavor, but because of what it represents.
If you read any of the books and paid attention, you’ll know that food is borderline worshipped throughout the pages. Everything – from the scraps the Nights Watch has to work with to the feasts that grace the tables in King’s Landing – is talked about and described in great details. But there’s one staple that has stood out above all else in Westeros from the times of the First Men.
Bread and Salt.
Bread and Salt are the most traditional provisions used when one wishes to invoke Guest Right.
Guest Right is an ancient and sacred tradition, honored and respected for thousands of years by all known religions and faiths in Westeros. Also known as The Sacred Law of Hospitality, it is a secret bond of trust and honor between a host and his guests that neither shall harm the other. Once the guest has eaten at the host’s table, under his roof, he is under his protection for the duration of the guest’s stay. Breaking these sacred laws is not only considered one of the most heinous crimes one can commit, but is also said to invoke the wrath of both the Old Gods and the New.
If you can recall in season 3, there were two instances where the Guest Right was broken. One was the Mutiny at Craster’s Keep and the other during the infamous Red Wedding.
Looking back, you’ll remember Catelyn and Robb Stark specifically asking Walder Frey to share his bread and salt with them. And during the insane – most social episode of any show in HBO history – The Rains of Castamere, you can see Stark, his mother, and his men, all standing with Frey as they almost ceremonially shared bread and salt with each other.
Many thanks to Snark Squad and their awesome gifs!
Click on that link for a great rundown of the episode where all of this took place.
The horrors orchestrated by Frey against his guests who were protected by guest right were heard throughout Westeros. Not only was his house looked down upon with disgust from that moment on, it also destroyed any honor his name had. On top of that, it left the sacred tradition of the guest right in question, with the safety and security in a strange castle no longer guaranteed.
So TL;DR…. Bread and Salt is a huge freaking deal.
I love the aspect of it. A simple thing like bread and salt having so many ties to ancient traditions; an unspoken oath between the host and guest of the house. It’s something that is still being acknowledged in certain cultures, but could be greatly appreciated more throughout the world.
Know how I know? One of the loaves I made for this post was shared between us and house guests we had over for the weekend (their visit was also the reason for this post being late a few days). As we stood around tearing off bread and dipping it in the salt, it almost felt as if we were acknowledging the sacred law of hospitality. It was a great feeling, until I explained the meaning to my wife and her friend who are not fans of Game of Thrones. The eye rolls and the “oh my God, you’re such a dork” I received kinda killed the mood. But still, it didn’t stop the warm feeling inside of partaking in an ancient tradition with friends. It also didn’t stop us from tearing that bread apart.
I recommend everyone do it at least once, and explain to your guests what it symbolizes. Yes, the best time to do so would be during a Game of Thrones viewing party, but anytime guests visit and stay would be just as good (especially if they’re fans of the show).
Bread and Salt
5 cups ~ All-Purpose Flour, divided
1/2 cup ~ Sugar
2 teaspoons ~ Salt
2 (.25 ounce) packages ~ Instant Dry Yeast
1 1/3 cup ~ Milk
4 tablespoons ~ Butter
2 each ~ Eggs2 each ~ Eggs, left whole for baking into the dough
1 each ~ Egg, beaten for glaze
Notes:
Alright lets do it:
My oven has a proofing feature. But if yours doesn’t, I used to let it sit on top of a recently used toaster oven, or on top of the refrigerator. I forgot where I read it, so kudos to who talked about it, but the new thing now is to put it on top of the dryer while it’s running. Also, if you live in Florida, just leave it sitting anywhere you’d like and it’ll rise with no problems.
Get it? Because Florida is a giant proofing box..
You shouldn’t flour your work surface to make the ropes because it’ll be hard to get them to roll and stretch out. I learned that the hard way.
There is one more step I forgot to take a picture of: Putting Rope B over Rope C.
After that just repeat from the beginning until the braid is complete.
I just put them together and tucked which is why my center is towards the side and not in the middle. Either way though, you’re not looking for perfection so it really doesn’t matter.
When they’ve cooled, pull the egg out and fill the divot with salt and you’re done.
Congratulations! You are now ready to make your guests feel safe under your roof.
As I said, the flavor is great, dipping it in the salt is addicting, and you feel this sense of pride when breaking it with friends. It will be perfect for any sort of get together, family gathering – like Easter – or viewing party. Haha.. 2 years in a row you get a Game of Thrones post instead of an Easter post. What kind of a food blog is this?!
A cool one! That’s the correct answer.
Wherever and with whomever you decide to share this with, just be sure to explain its significance. You may be called a dork but at least you’ll look like a knowledgeable dork. And there is a difference!
Happy 4th season of Game of Thrones! If you’re a fan and you’ll be watching, hit me up on Twitter or G+ so we could talk about it.
Click here if you want to checkout the great
string quartet version of “The Rains of Castamere”
performed by Chris Amaterasu
Click here if you want to check out
the chillingly awesome song version of “The rains of Castamere”
If you’ve never made caramelized onions before then you’ve been missing out. It has to be the best way to have onions. …If you don’t count deep frying them. I can understand if you were intimidated and didn’t want to venture into the deep, dark, …Read More….
“What’s Taters, eh?” “PO-TAY-TOES! Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew…” Haha. Sorry… Whenever I see the word “taters” I always hear poor, little Smeagol asking what they are. I love me some mashed potatoes. And there are close to a bajillion ways …Read More….
I’m not going to lie to you. I never made creamed corn before I started making shepherd’s pie. I never had any ambition to make it. I never had it growing up. My grandmother used to make a thousand things but never once do I recall her making creamed corn. When I made it the first time, my wife had to correct me on how it was supposed to taste!
Fast forward to today and I’m still not a master creamed corn maker, but I’m alright. I’d like to give you more deep insight on where creamed corn came from, who made it, maybe some sort of crazy fun fact that would make it a million times cooler, but I don’t have anything and I don’t want to lie to you. I really hope the creamed corn communities and lovers out there can find it in their hearts to forgive me for looking like I don’t care about their side of choice. Hopefully they’ll stop cursing me after they see what I have to offer.
On second though, I do have a little corn related story!
A long time ago, when my wife and I used to go to concerts regularly (by regularly, I mean like 4 or 5 a year), something we’ll always remember happened…
We were in the line waiting for the doors to the KoRn show to open. The venue was the Hard Rock in Orlando, so it was in the middle of Universal City Walk where all sorts of people, mainly families, were walking from park to park. So we’re in this line, more than likely wearing black along with everyone else because you know, KoRn. And this older mother and her younger son stop, tap me on the shoulder and ask me in a mild southern accent, no less:
“Excuse me, but what is this line for?”
“…It’s for KoRn.”
“Corn? … *looks up and down the line full of gothic kids dressed in black, with piercings and guys with eyeliner* … “Why are all these people in such a long line for corn?!”
“Haha.. No, it’s a rock band called KoRn. We’re here for a concert.”
“Oh… Ok.” … *walks away explaining to son that it’s not corn-corn*
And there’s my KoRn story for my creamed corn post. I don’t know about you, but it’s still funny to us!
Creamed Corn:1 can ~ Corn Kernels
2 tablespoons ~ Butter
3 tablespoons ~ Sugar
1 teaspoon ~ Rosemary
a pinch ~ Salt
½ teaspoon ~ Pepper
2 tablespoon ~ flour
2 cups ~ Milk
Notes:
Let’s get to creamin’:
When you’re using a roux, whatever you’re trying to thicken won’t be fully thickened until it’s been simmering for a good 10-20 minutes. You need time for all the flour to absorb the liquid and create a creamy product.
And that’s that. Creamed corn. It sounds like I’m downplaying it, but when I make it I always tell myself I have to make it more often. It’s creamy, tasty, and easy. Hope you like!